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第34部分（第4页）

knew　how　much　bullshit　Al　would　take　from　him　in　the　name　of　auld　lang　syne。　If

Ullman　was　as　good　as　he　claimed　to　be；　and　if　he　gave　Al　a　he…goes…or…I…go

ultimatum；　might　not　Al　be　forced　to　take　it？　He　closed　his　eyes　and　tried　to

imagine　telling　Wendy。　Guess　what；　babe？　I　lost　another　job。　This　time　I　had　to

go　through　two　thousand　miles　of　Bell　Telephone　cable　to　find　someone　to　punch

out；　but　I　managed　it。

He　opened　his　eyes　and　wiped　his　mouth　with　his　handkerchief。　He　wanted　a

drink。　Hell；　he　needed　one。　There　was　a　cafe　just　down　the　street；　surely　he　had

time　for　a　quick　beer　on　his　way　up　to　the　park；　just　one　to　lay　the　dust　。。。

He　clenched　his　hands　together　helplessly。

The　question　recurred：　Why　had　he　called　Ullman　in　the　first　place？　The　number

of　the　Surf…Sand　in　Lauderdale　had　been　written　in　a　small　notebook　by　the　phone

and　the　CB　radio　in　the　office…plumbers　numbers；　carpenters；　glaziers；

electricians；　others。　Jack　had　copied　it　onto　the　matchbook　cover　shortly　after

getting　out　of　bed；　the　idea　of　calling　Ullman　fullblown　and　gleeful　in　his

mind。　But　to　what　purpose？　Once；　during　the　drinking　phase；　Wendy　had　accused

him　of　desiring　his　own　destruction　but　not　possessing　the　necessary　moral　fiber

to　support　a　full…blown　deathwish。　So　he　manufactured　ways　in　which　other　people

could　do　it；　lopping　a　piece　at　a　time　off　himself　and　their　family。　Could　it　be

true？　Was　be　afraid　somewhere　inside　that　the　Overlook　might　be　just　what　he

needed　to　finish　his　play　and　generally　collect　tip　his　shit　and　get　it

together？　Was　he　blowing　the　whistle　on　himself？　Please　God　no；　dont　let　it　be

that　way。　Please。

He　closed　his　eyes　and　an　image　immediately　arose　on　the　darkened　screen　of

his　inner　lids：　sticking　his　hand　through　that　hole　in　the　shingles　to　pull　out

the　rotted　flashing；　the　sudden　needling　sting；　his　own　agonized；　startled　cry

in　the　still　and　unheeding　air：　Oh　you　goddamn　fucking　son　of　a　bitch　。。。

Replaced　with　an　image　two　years　earlier；　himself　stumbling　into　the　house　at

three　in　the　morning；　drunk；　falling　over　a　table　and　sprawling　full…length　on

the　floor；　cursing；　waking　Wendy　up　on　the　couch。　Wendy　turning　on　the　light；

seeing　his　clothes　ripped　and　smeared　from　some　cloudy　parking…lot　scuffle　that

had　occurred　at　a　vaguely　remembered　honky…tonk　just　over　the　New　Hampshire

border　hours　before；　crusted　blood　under　his　nose；　now　looking　up　at　his　wife；

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